This post is out of order.  It is dated September 2, 2013.  It goes with the pictures of Rosemary Hill and Gordon Street but the dumb blog wouldn't let me put it there.  Rosemary

Heyyyyyy Momma!

Sorry this week's email is going to be short.  I only have an hour to get everyone cause I decided to play football with my whole zone all day.  It was way way fun!

Mother, keep asking questions, I not only expect it, it gives me something to tell you.  I like to send these, and I like your questions, so stop worrying about them.  I can answer all of them.  You birthed me, I think it's my responsibility to tell you about my life at least once a week.  And I love you. That's why I really want to email you every week and answer your whole huge list of questions. I really really love you, and miss you.  A lot.

So please, ask away.

I'm thinking I'm just going to buy a bike from a car boot sale (garage sale in the back of a bunch of cars.) They happen every once in a while, and maybe I'll even find my bike, just spray painted a different color so that I don't know it's mine.

I don't know where Amsterdam is.  I think it's in both Holland and the Netherlands.  My district leader lives in the Hague. (I think that's how you spell it.  Haygg is how it sounds.)

I'll tell you about my investigators in a moment.

I didn't look up the Price name.  It was a super busy day at the Castle, because it was Bank Holiday.  They have them like once every two months, and they're similar to Labor Day and all the fake holidays.  Basically it's just an excuse for everyone to not work for a day, including libraries.. which sucks for us.  That's why I emailed on Tuesday last week.

Your work sounds nice, wanna switch for a while?  My work is very hot lately, and very long.  I have 11 hour work days with 2 hours off for lunch and dinner.  Out talking to people that don't really think I'm a human.  That's my biggest problem out here, the dehumanization of missionaries by locals.  They think that because of what I do, it's totally socially acceptable to completely blow us off, or act extremely rude.  I got a lot of the extremely rude this week.  It makes me want to be extremely rude, but I can't, because I'm a representative of Jesus, and Jesus wouldn't be extremely rude. But... Christ had to go through quite a lot worse than we do.. So, I guess we have it easy.  Although, honestly, sometimes it doesn't seem like it could be much harder.

Yeah, poor Udalls.  I've thought that for some time now.  Michael and I used to be really good friends.  But, he picked his own way, and thinks it's the right way.  Poor guy, the right answer is right under his nose, and he doesn't realize it.

Dane's a dork.  I love that guy.  Does he still drive his Mustang?  Where is Nancy from?  Is that acceptable to ask?  It is over here, and I actually am keeping track of all the different nationalities that I run into here.  It's quite a long list.  It's pretty cool, I talk to just as many people that aren't from England as I do that are from England.  Probably more foreigners actually.  It's pretty nuts.  I met a woman from Finland the other day, she works at the French Cafe right by our flat, called Comme Si Comme Sa, or however that is spelt. So she's Finnish, working in an English city, serving French food.  Only in the UK.  Either way, give Dane a high-five for sealing the deal for me, and tell him that I always knew he could do it.

Stop going to Swiss Days.  It's too hot and it's in the middle of nowhere.

I do like that collar though.  Nice touch.

Good job on the missionaries.  Tell them everything you know about everyone.  Be over the top courageous.  They want it.  Or at least, I want it, and maybe I can ride on some of the good vibes you throw out in Utah.  Like maybe if you feed them and tell them where to find some investigators, maybe somebody here will do that for me.

I should write Eli.  I usually don't have time.  I have a mother, a mission president, a girlfriend, and three sisters, and then I have friends and other relatives that want to talk as well.  I do my best though.

My companion needs a long fart in the mouth.  I'm getting pretty sick of him, but I'm doing my best (sometimes) to act like I like him.  I don't.  Sorry.  I think I'm going to ask President if I can have a new companion next transfer, but it feels like if I ask, he'll make me stay with the Hound Dog.  That's what I call him.  It helps the seriousness a little.. a little.  I wrestled him the other day and drew on his face with a highlighter, he didn't like it, but he needed it, and I needed a laugh.  Don't worry, it came off easy.  I'm struggling with him a bit though.. Say an extra prayer or two for me and my patience.

This week we've gotten a bunch of investigators.

There was Rajeev from last week, and he came to church with us, but I don't think he liked it.. He left after Sacrament..

Then there's Michele, who I actually think will get baptized.  She came to church and enjoyed it I think.  We're teaching her about the Plan of Salvation tonight.  I think she'll like it.  I think it's my favorite lesson to teach.  It's actually one of my favorite parts of the Gospel.  Specifically pray for her.  She has the most potential of any of our investigators right now.  Oh, and she's Irish.

Then there's Laura, who is thirteen and is basically a member, but her parents wont let her get baptized.

And then we have Simon and Mila, Simon is a catholic, aka nothing, and a football journalist, it seemed like he just wanted info on us, but his wife came to talk to us as well, and she's from Spain, and she seemed legitimately interested.  They're going to feed us this week sometime (sweeeeeeet.)

Then there's Kelish and Dave, and they're immigrants from India, and also Jehovah's Witnesses.  I don't really know if they completely understand that we don't believe the same things they do, but they like us and we've taught them about the restoration.  We're in the process of getting a punjabi Book of Mormon so they can read it in their own language, but here's the tricky part.  Kelish (Kuh-Lish) is in India helping out with her poorly sister for the next three weeks, so they're kind of on hold.

Patrick's doing good too.  We got a member from our ward to come teach with us, and now they're best friends.  So that's really really good.  I think he'll get baptized, but maybe in like.. six months.  He'll be an interesting process.  He's Irish as well.

Then we have a load of potentials, so pray for me, I need it.  It's starting to cool down here though, which makes me very happy.  When people see two white shirts with badges on they literally cross the street so they don't have to talk to us.  Then we cross the street too. Haha.  But it'll be nice getting in a coat.  (I have a nice one.  Elder Lewis gave it to me.  So don't worry about the cold.) (I'll still probably whine when it gets dark and rainy and cold still.  You're my mom, who else do I have to whine to?)

So. In total, I'm teaching Three Indian, Two Irish, Two English, and a Spaniard.  Pretty cool.

Here's the funny story of the week, and then I need to write some other people.

So a lot of the time, when the Hound Dog and I don't have anything else to do, we'll go into Town Centre and just talk to people, we call it GQing (Golden Questioning) and try to get some people who will let us come teach them.  This past saturday, we were on our way into town centre, and tallking to people, and people were being particularly more nasty than usual.  We were wondering why until we got into town centre and in the park there a huge gay pride concert going on.  We decided that was probably a sign that we should try something else.  Haha, so we went tracting.  Tracting is good.  It's like a game for me, trying to get into people's homes and teach them the restoration.  It's fun, but hard.  I'm getting better at it though.

So this week was Dad's birthday, and I tried to get to Gordon St on his birthday, but alas, I only made it to Rosemary Hill, but we tracted Gordon St the next day.  I'll send pictures.  There were hardly anyone home on Gordon St, but we talked with this very nice mother, and gave her a book of mormon and I legitimately think she'll read it and call us and tell us what she thought.  However, that promise has never held, but whatever. haha maybe this time.  Dad should help me out.  She lives on his street.

Anyways, I love you! Have a lovely day.

From your baby boohoo,

Elder Smart